Friday, September 27, 2013

Frank Fridays: Wrong Side of the Universe

Happy Friday!

So, I'm pretty sure I woke up- or was woken up- on the wrong side of the universe today.  Yes, I said universe... no, I'm not being dramatic.  Let's just take a looksey, shall we?  You be the judge.  *Warning, this is long*

6:30am- ring, ring... Look at my phone thinking it's my alarm but why is it making that god awful noise?  Oh yeah, I forgot to put on a cool ringer and then omg who is calling me at this ungodly hour?  I already know the answer- "Hi mom... what".  No, it wasn't very nice. On the other end of the phone I hear in a chipper Wisconsin meets Starbucks venti quad more caffine than I drink in a month voice that says "Oh my God, you're not up yet?  What time is it?  Why aren't you up?".  While a few superlatives run through my brain, I manage "It's 6:30am Mom and I don't get up until 7.  What do you want?"  Sidenote, for all of you that just had an "ah hah" moment to why I'm always late- you're completely correct.  I value my bed more than I value curled hair, breakfast, mascara sometimes and getting to work on time.  You caught me.  Either way, this thrilling conversation with my Mother continued for a good 5 min before she let me go.  Ps- Mom, if you're reading this.  I wasn't awake and I have no idea what we spoke about.  Love you!  *rolling over to go back to sleep*

6:40am- *door creaks open, light pours in from the hall and I hear my Husband before he says anything*  "Babe, can you please give me a ride to work?  At this point I'm blinded by rage, seeing red, ready to kill and D, all of the above... this is when a few superlatives DID come out.  I mean stop collaborate and listen... you mean to tell me that out of the 50 people on the boat, 25 of which live within 100 yards of us you can't find ONE person driving to the SAME BOAT as you, at the SAME TIME!?  I should mention there's one boat in Cordova, they all go in at the same time and I looked out the window to see um....  10 cars on and driving by/getting ready/warming up!!  Yeah, that just happened.  Then, my lovely husband realizes he's awoken the sleeping devil grizzley bear and tries to correct his mistake by saying "Oh, there's Vince and his car is on so I'll just see if I can catch a ride"...  oh no, no, no Mister.  I'm already up and storming to the car.  It's too late to salvage.  Needless to say it was a quiet car ride.

6:50am- Get back into bed.  Decide to hell with my hair and make up and set alarm for 7:15.  Roll over, get comfy and tell myself that when I wake up, I'm going to have a better day.  I have to.  I say this not for myself but for every living person I come into contact with today.  Did I mention I'm an Admin Asst at a school?  Yeah, this could be dangerous.

7:15- Swear at alarm, and dog, and swear that it isn't time yet.  It's time.  So I get up, shower *do not shave my legs as punishment and defiance*, blare some music sorry neighbor who doesn't work, try out a new make up "look" and decide today is the morning I am going to try the "sock bun".  Yes, I'm certifiably crazy or very very sleep deprived at this point.  Looking back, I may thought that I was dreaming and this was all going to work out fabulously for the red carpet I was walking? 

7:45- Cut sock, put hair in pony tail, look at tutorial ONE more time and execute.  FAIL.  No... EPIC FAIL.  Yes I took a picture, no you can't see it.  Let's just say it was a fail with a doughnut on the top of my head that looked NOTHING like the pretty ballerinas or super fashionable ladies I see sporting these all the time.  Effortless- my arse.

Can I just tell you that this marked the second Pinterest fail in less than 12 hours.  Yeah, I tried to make those cookie meets brownie and has oreo babies dessert that looked so good over at Wifessionals.  Of course, I had to semi-homake it, because I'm "Annalee" if you don't get the pun, never mind.  Let me tell you, they are not for me.  I lurve each item separately, but when placed together all I tasted was sugary rich yuckiness.  I needed a gallon of milk to recover, and I'm lactose intolerant!  It was bad... so I sent them to the boat!  Waste not, want not.  You're welcome boys!    

So this is how the story morning ends... I'm late to work, sleep deprived, there was no time for my Spark (healthy coffee with vitamins) and I look like a homeless person.  Today is going to be fantastic! *sarcasm dripping like venom from my smile

...And then someone says the nicest things to me, making me put down my hateraide and reminding me that things could be a lot worse.  Like, a lot worse.  However, don't think I'm not reaching for wine the second I get off!  Have a great Friday and don't forget to be frank!

How's your Friday?  Have you tried a sock bun?  Can you bring me coffee??  Please?

Link up and tell me all about it!
Until next time...

Life, Laughs and Ladds: Frank Fridays

3 comments:

  1. Oh no! He woke the sleeping beast!!!! Aaahh! Here's to hoping your weekend is back on the right side of luck! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Replies
    1. Right? But if we didn't have the bad, we'd forget to recognize the good...

      Delete