Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Cordovaisms Vol. 2

3. The Theme Song
(Hear it in a shouted yet sing-songy voice)

You hear it on the radio, hear it on the streets and hear it every time something really get's your goat about this lovely little place I've called "home" for the past 2 years.  Wow, I have been here that long.  Guess time flies when you've got Alzheimer's you're having fun!  That catchy little phrase will get stuck in your head for days!  That war cry is just one more thing you have to love about Cordova!

4. The price you pay to live in Paradise
My Father-in-Law's favorite phrase is "Well Annalee, that's the price you pay to live in Paradise".  Is it Bob?  What IS this magical price and paradise you talk about?  Should I actually tell you what the price is??  Hmm... wanna go to the big city- hope you've got deep pockets! Airfare, ferry, groceries, internet-(who knew you could limit this?), cable, FOOD, restaurants, gas- everything even those "basic" necessities I seriously took for granted will cost ya.  Anyone drink milk?  How about for $8?  That's what I thought!  Ahhh, guess that's just the price we pay to live in Paradise see how annoying that little gem can get?!

5.  Fishing Rules 101

The first rule about this fishing club, is that we don't talk about the fishing club. Wait, is this fight club? No really, there is more Don’t ask, Don’t tell going on here than a military squad at a Broadway show!  Yep, went there!  Real fisherman don’t ask people how much they made and don’t go bragging about their catch.  That is considered 1.  Bad manners 2. People will follow you- duh!  And 3. um, do you want people in your honey hole?  I didn't think so Honey Boo Boo...
Also, you should abide by these rules:
            Don’t set to close.
            Don’t talk tooo much trash because when you need help, no one will offer
            Bring stuff to do. Like lots.

If you follow my etiquette tips you're sure to make it at least 5 min without someone making fun of you- wait, what are you wearing?  I take that back.

6.  You don't lose your girlfriend you lose your turn.  
As my friend Kelsey so eloquently put it, you never really lose your girlfriend because there's always someone here to pick her up, dust her off and then you're on to the next lady you probably have nakie pictures with in a tub when you were 4.  You see, that's the beauty of this little isolated fishing village.  You never really see that many people coming in or moving out of town.  I'm always amazed when my husband and I run to the store to grab something quick and end up talking for 20 min to 5 different people who want to talk about, I kid you not, everything.  

That being said, this is a VERY small pond for those poor souls trying to date in it.  Think, Little Mermaid small with no singing until 1am when everyone's had a few too many.  However, there is an upside to this little problem.  You already know everything about so in so's dating history.  Did he treat her right?  Does he have a disease?  Is he..."well known"?  Is he one taco short of a fiesta?  All questions that can be asked and answered while running your daily errands!  Fret not doting daters, one man's smoked salmon leftovers could be your fabulous new salmon dip.  Perspective is everything!!

7.  Xtra Tuffs- fashion vs function? 
In Cordova you get both!  If you've never come across these gems let me paint a little picture for you.  Tall milk chocolate rubber boots with a faded mustardy-beige (yes, that's a technical term) toe and band around the top.  Oh, and don't forget the "Made in 'Merica" label proudly stamped on the front of your shin.  Don't be fooled by the company who may or may not have sold out and are no longer "made in 'merica", these boots are tough.  Xtra Tuff.  These boots are not only a staple to every fisherman trudging around little fishy guts on his slippery boat they are also a coveted fashion statement and right of passage into fisherlady fashion!  These boots can be dressed up and paired with a cute little dress and leggings or pulled over some tucked in jeans!  Versatile, I think so... Fashion crime?... Definitely!  Don't worry friends, I've held out for two years and don't plan on letting the body snatchers get ahold of these calves anytime soon! 

Until we meet again 'Merica!


  1. Oh yes island life can be costly. I remember that when we lived on Oahu. Just to buy milk was expensive. Then anything they have to ship furniture, was so much more than it would be on the mainland. the price of paradise. Good thing the beaches are free. :)

    Bonnie Rose | A Compass Rose

    1. Give me a warm and sunny beach and I'm sold!!

  2. Seriously...I love this!!! Favorite post ever! DONE! Best line ever, " Fret not doting daters, one man's smoked salmon leftovers could be your fabulous new salmon dip." LOL Luv you!

  3. Best line I have heard all week " Fret not doting daters, one man's smoked salmon leftovers could be your fabulous new salmon dip. Perspective is everything!!"

  4. I love this! Glad to have ya back and hop you enjoyed the vaca!